My Fear

I don’t deem the instinctive thrill, what we usually preceive in horror movies, as fear.

Fear is accumulative.

Sometimes, in the middle of the night, I would lie on my bed awake and look at my surroundings.

Sometimes, I can imagine the most hideous form out of the most normal thing.

Sometimes, I wonder whether these imaginations are also a part of me... am I just liberating them from the ordinary characteristics of mine?

Maybe there are eyes behind the curtain, under the bed, or at the dim corner of the ceiling...

It creeps into my mind, little by little, and at a certain point,

explode.

我不認為直覺性的驚嚇(也就是恐怖片裡感受到的那種)就是恐懼。

恐懼是累積性的。

在某些午夜時分,我會清醒的躺在床上觀察我的周遭。

有時,我可以想像出最平凡的事物中最駭人的那一面。

有時,我不禁懷疑這些幻想其實也是我的一部份... 或許我只是將它們從正常的性格之中解放出來而已?

它們的雙眼有可能隱身在窗簾之後、床底之下亦或是天花板和牆壁交集的陰暗角落...

這些情緒一點一滴的潛進我心中,

直到一個臨界點,

爆發。

My biggest fear are being stared at, being swallowed, and being strangled.

So when I got a sheet paper as my basic material, I drew terrified eyes on it,tore up its margins, crumpled it up, and winded it with aluminum wire.

我最大的恐懼是被不斷的注視、被吞噬、還有被束縛。

所以當我拿到一張紙作為基本材料時,我在上面畫上一雙驚恐的眼、撕去它的邊、揉爛它、然後用鋁鐵絲將它纏起來。

A respected and erudite friend of mine suggested that this piece, especially when I shoot it with slight shaking, reminded him of Francis Bacon’s paintings. Thus, I took inspirations from Study after Velázquez's Portrait of Pope Innocent X (1953) and edited it with “double exposure effects” to enhance the visual that represented strong emotions. Just like the painting, I didn’t intend to associate my edit with any religious or political implications.

我一位備受尊重且博學的朋友曾告訴我這件作品(特別是當我用上下晃動的方式拍攝時)讓他聯想到二十世紀的具象藝術巨匠法蘭西斯·培根的作品。因此,我從他的 Study after Velázquez's Portrait of Pope Innocent X (1953) 汲取靈感,然後用重曝的方式增強表現強烈情緒的視覺效果。跟他創作那幅畫時一樣,我的作品沒有任何針對宗教或政治的隱喻。

I didn’t do much brainstorming, since I felt like it should look just the way it was.

It was structural, distorted, and always in motion.

我在這次創作時事前也沒有想太多,因為我覺得我的恐懼就是該長這樣。

它是立體的、扭曲的、且存於動態之中。

xx, Winnie WYC

Featuring:

"My Fear" (2017) multimedia display art by Winnie Chen

Photography & Post-edit: Winnie Chen

Material: Sketching paper, watercolor, calligraphy ink, aluminum wire

@_winniewyc_